Written by: Lydia on SUNDAY, OCT 15, 2023
This formidable and all-encompassing feeling is a force that springs from our thoughts and resonates throughout our bodies. It clings to your throat, constricting your breath, freezes your body in its tracks, robs you of your freedom, and belittles your very being. Have you found yourself ensnared by it? As much as I loathe it, I understand that when I confront it, I’m presented with a new lease on life—a chance for my soul to evolve. I can feel it in my chest, an insistent force pushing me around, attempting to assert its dominance. Yet, I recognize it for what it is—a colossal mirage, painted with the hues of my imagination, crafted by my ego or subconscious. It masks something immense and significant right before me, the start of a new chapter.
Fear confronted me at this very moment, 12:55 pm Dubai time, as I’m soaring above the world on my way to DC. In this isolated, vulnerable, and disconnected state, I’ve lost my sense of time. I am tossed high up in the air, and there it is… Hello, Fear! I acknowledge you, I see you, and I am conscious of your presence. Your mere existence carries a message, signaling that something is poised to shift and change in my life—a new chapter awaits!
Yes, there was that one week in Dubai when you sent me tumbling to the depths. And here you are once again, ready to deliver another punch. Fine, I’ll take it. Because I know that right after this, I’ll be granted a moment of liberation, an opportunity to fashion a new mindset. But before that, we shall engage in combat.
I comprehend that I can’t return to the US as the same person who left. Our home has surely transformed by now, and the weight of this realization is about to descend upon me. My DCDA dance studio—my Achilles’ heel, so precious to my heart—your knowledge of it is well-known. Go ahead, punch it, strike the weak spot. But you know what? The harder you hit, the better, for I’ll tumble faster and rise stronger. I welcome the challenge!
Fear is immovable. Yet, I can stride past it through action. Fear is astute, knowing precisely when to manifest, and it unfailingly shows up larger than life. Nevertheless, it’s akin to a flat screen hologram, a virtual image. You can puncture her façade at any moment if you dare. Don’t be beguiled by her illusion of superiority. You have two options: persevere, take measured, deliberate steps toward your destination, or engage with her. Engage, and allow Fear to narrate her story, caution you about potential pitfalls, and enumerate your latent vulnerabilities that you may not have even recognized. If you choose the latter, remember, it’s HER story, born out of a fearful love for you, fueled by the noblest intentions. But it’s not YOUR story, nor is it the truth. The truth invariably resides in your heart. It’s your light. Embrace that light, follow it, and keep it in your sights.
If you opt for the former—action, action, step by step—just keep moving forward. Fear will soon trail behind because it’s a lumbering entity unable to match the swiftness of action, even if it’s just incremental steps. Undoubtedly, like an elusive digital hologram, it may reappear, but it won’t journey with you. It will linger at the same spot. All you need to do is keep moving!
I am grateful for this encounter with Fear at this juncture. I can eloquently document her presence, understand her nature, and appreciate the privilege and honor of being in her majesty’s presence. A new chapter in my life is about to unfurl.
Weeks ago, I penned in my journal, without fully comprehending, that the next time my foot touches the US border, I will be a blogger. Little did I know that the border of the US would be located in Abu Dhabi for all those on the Etihad flight to DC. And here I am, a blogger! Much remains to be accomplished. You might even label this “baby” as “ugly,” but this appearance is only temporary, akin to a newborn with fragile skin, closed eyes, deaf ears, and no voice. Yet, it’s a priceless and beautiful creation the world will embrace. Fear is all over this, muttering every conceivable objection, but that’s fine! “You can’t write,” “Nobody will read your pitiful, dull articles,” “It’s all pointless,” “You have no experience,” “What do you know about blogging?” “No one needs you at the studio,” “Nobody!” “What makes you think you can escape your comfortable life?” I won’t even delve into the plethora of vivid objections you can expect from your Fear. Millions of people can probably recount similar refrains from their very own Fears, her majesty, and none are likely to boost one’s confidence. But that’s alright. Always remember, the harder the push, the better. The more ferocious the attack, the stronger you’ll emerge. The more genuine it sounds, the more astonishing your breakthrough is destined to be. Have no fear in front of Fear. Acknowledge her, extend a polite nod, and keep dancing toward your splendid new life. Fear is merely a curtain between your present self and the potential new you. The larger the dream, the grander the stage, the more imposing the curtain. But always, a grander and more remarkable YOU!
Hello, Fear!!!! Delighted to make your acquaintance!!!!
From the very first “F” with which I commenced my blog, through the paragraphs in between, to the closing “!”, I’m already sensing an incredible freedom and invigoration. You can do the same! Write about your Fear! Pen your thoughts to your Fear, and emancipate yourself! Cherish your Fear, for its presence signifies growth!
